The lost Left Sock

I once saw this episode of Ren and Stimpy where they found the mountain of lost left socks. I can’t really remember what all else happened in the episode that led them to the mountain of lost left socks but, it was then established that this was a universal problem among the human race that socks do indeed go missing, mysteriously even, to who knows where other than the mythical mountain of lost left socks. 
A lot of times it’s in the wash. I have personally placed even numbers of socks, confirming the count multiple times to still come out with a missing sock. Static sometimes dispositions them to a endoparasitoidal existence clinging to a towel or sweater but, in most cases it just simply vanishes.
As a little side note. In my personal walk in life there is no left or right sock. They are universal in placement but, I know there are people out there who designate socks as left or right so I will not judge. My grandfather was one of those.
So, while packing for vacation the whole family made a run at my sock drawer. They have their own socks of course but, they lose them and default to mine and usually getting them back isn’t much of problem, except for family vacations. 
Dredging in late in the night means; no time to unpack, no time to do laundry, but the next morning when every one, exhausted from the trip and with very little sleep, starts to get ready for school a panic sets in. The sock drawer is empty. No socks.
Over the next couple of days I finally managed to get everyone to give up the socks that they had packed and, I swear, half the load that I put in the washer was socks, a bunch of them was their own socks that they never can find, but still, when the load was washed and dried, there was about four socks with no mate and only one pair that mated.
In my mind I honestly don’t know where to even begin to unravel this mystery that plagues modern western civilization. Could there really be a mountain of lost left socks. Is this a tribute maybe to some orthopedic deity, or something akin to the underpants gnomes from South Park. Sock trolls that build and replenish the mountain of lost left socks conspiring with sock manufacturers to make us buy more socks. Who knows, maybe one day this enigma will be solved on an episode of In Search of.

Salutation pending
Johnny R Draper 

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